Work in Progress Update

I recently finished writing the first draft of my Work in Progress. At the moment it's over 150,000 words, and is currently being edited by my wife - a self-professed "Grammar Nazi" who volunteered for the job. She's hoping to be done with it by this week, after which I'll  go through and double check it myself.

Here is a basic summary of the plot:

In the mountains of Calambria, the dwarf tribes have disappeared, and merchants have been expelled. Two are assigned to investigate this mystery: Edmund, a human from the Order of Magi, who are gifted with the ability to utilize the elements; and Diane, an elf from the Sisterhood of Dagger Maidens, who excel in close combat. As they attempt to uncover what has happened, they discover betrayal and secrets not only from outside the continent, but from within as well. Soon they uncover a plot with dangers that will go well beyond the mountains.

After I get done with the editing, I intend to follow the next guideline:

1. Come up with a title for the dang thing (currently working on this while the editing is going on).
2. Send the polished draft to beta readers for further opinions and changes.
3. Design the cover art for Kindle and print.
4. Publish!

My goal is to publish within the beginning of March.

I hope to discuss and explain this further in future blog posts. Please let me know in the comment section if you have any other questions or comments.

Using a Writer's Journal

"I have about five or six random doodles right here."

Do you use a writer's journal or notebook when you're planning a book or a series? Or even just for random ideas?

I asked this question on Twitter some time ago, and pinned it on my page to see if I could garner some responses. Some people said they just kept everything in their head. Others said that they definitely did, and filled it with various ideas that came to mind. I was originally the former, since I was pretty good at remembering things. Usually I would make a single document with a list of characters, important places, and a synopsis of where my story was going. I didn't start writing until the synopsis was all figured out, though I permitted myself improvisation or adding things to the story as characters and plot elements developed.

Over time, I began to wonder if there would be some benefit in a writer's journal. Finally, I stopped by CVS Pharmacy on the way home from work and bought a $4 pocket journal (because there was no way I was spending $50 on one of Barnes & Nobles' journals). I started jotting down world building ideas, and facts about my current fantasy Work-in-Progress (still unnamed at the time of this writing). I was just collecting ideas, but soon I found that I was enjoying this. I started doodling animals and creatures in my world, and creating maps to help better plan where my characters would go, and what cities or peoples they would encounter. I started sharing them on Twitter, and had people faving, retweeting, and commenting on them. I shared my doodles and notes with my wife, and received feedback from her regarding them.

What I found was my writer's journal became a nice little database to collect ideas that popped in my head or quotes I heard. It also became a pocket sized reference source that I could turn to in my story if I needed to remember a place name or the name of someone important in my world's history. It likewise encouraged me to think more on my world and how it functioned, and what it's history was like. If I had time before work, or I was sitting somewhere bored, I took out my journal and began to jot down any ideas that came to my mind. It got to the point where my journal joined my wallet, keys, and cell phone in the prestigious "I feel naked leaving the house without this" group. It has become a part of my writing which makes it fun and engaging.

Don't worry - I'm in no way saying you aren't a "real writer" unless you use a writer's journal. If you're like some of the people who replied to tweet and you like to just keep things in your head, that's absolutely fine. To paraphrase a Reese's commercial: there's no wrong way to plan your story.

Yes, I write 1-star reviews (and here's why)

I had an interesting experience last week on Twitter, after I shared some links to a 1-star review I had written on Amazon. This led to sharing other 1-star reviews, and soon all the people with whom I was speaking said something to the affect of, "Whoa, dude! I do not want you reading my books!" I think they were half-kidding...but half-kidding also means they were half-serious. Some people on Twitter became downright terrified of me because I had written some 1-star reviews. And not only that, but I had written detailed 1-star reviews, outlining everything I found wrong with the book. People were worried that I would find their book, find every tiny flaw in the style of the Cinema Sins YouTube series, and tear their book apart.

So yes, I confess that sometimes I write 1-star reviews. Now let me expand on that...

Let's first establish that if you read most of my reviews (especially if you've also read the books I've reviewed), I think you'll find I'm actually pretty gracious. When I read a book, even if it's in a genre I'm not particularly fond of (eg., romance), I ask myself this one question: "Is the author doing a good job in their role?" So take the example of the romance author. Are the characters likable? Can I relate to them as people? Do I care what happens to the characters? Is the description understandable? Is the plot interesting rather than tired and cliche? Do I want to finish the story? Even if I don't like the romance genre, if a romance author has fulfilled all this, then they can probably expect at least a 4-star rating from me.

I think part of the problem today is that so many people react with extremes. They didn't like something? Automatic 1-star! They sort of liked something? Automatic 5-stars! No one seems to think, "Alright, even if I didn't like this, it has some merit"; or alternatively, "Alright, I thought this was nice, but there were a few flaws." So, if you receive a 1-star review from me, it's because your book has reached a level where I personally do not believe it is even ready for the market. Which means yes, I really truly do believe your book deserves a single star rating. I try to reserve 1-stars for what I believe would be a complete waste of time for the average reader.

If I do write a 1-star review, do I make it thorough? Yes, I do. However, that's because I don't believe in writing negative reviews that amount to, "This sucks. The End." If I offer someone constructive criticism, I let them know my reasons for said criticism. The best professors I had in college were the ones who could look at my work and say, "You're bad at this. Don't do this as much. You're good at this. Hone in on this.", etc. I try to do that for authors, whether I like their work or don't particularly care for it, because I believe it is only respectful that, if you disagree with someone or believe their work has flaws, you attempt to explain to them why you feel that way.

But this also brings up a much larger problem within the Indie Publishing community, which is review fishing. That is, writing positive reviews in the hopes of getting positive reviews back. One might even lump in here writing positive reviews for friends just to help them out. While this isn't true across the board, some people think they are entitled to highly rated reviews. Keep in mind here that I am not saying if you like someone you shouldn't review their work. If you have a good friend and they wrote a book, go ahead and review it! The problem is when we begin to say, "OK, I'll write a positive review not necessarily because the book itself was good, but to give them a higher rating and make others think it's good." That's where our intentions become flawed.

And on this subject, I have a bit of a horror story...

Several years ago, I played a game entitled The Movies. It was somewhat inspired by The Sims, except here you could make your own movie studio and design your own movies from a collection of pre-made scenes. What was really cool was you could upload your movies to the game designer's website and get other people to watch, rate, and review them. One such person I had met on The Movies forum came to me and asked me to rate his film. I watched it, and I liked it. It wasn't a Kurosawa successor, but I thought it was alright, so I gave it 4-stars. When the guy saw it, he lost his mind! He contacted me on IM, and berated me for not giving him a full 5-stars. He claimed that his film "deserved it" and that I was an a--hole. When I apologized for upsetting him, I received a curt "Whatever" and was blocked.

Obviously this was over a silly computer game, but people can be like this about their written work. Some people go ballistic over negative reviews. Even more saddening is that there have been recorded instances where an author who has received a negative review from another author will gather up his buddies and go spam that other author's books with negative reviews. Yes, you read that right - some people do revenge reviewing. This instills a level of fear in some authors (and I'll admit, this thought has crossed my mind a few times) that if they write negative reviews, people will be out to get them. Perhaps there's even a fear that, if you review one author's work negatively, you may get backlash in the community and become the black sheep.

Brothers and sisters, things ought not to be this way.

When we review, we should review honestly. If you really did like the book, then fine and dandy. If you didn't like the book, you're entitled to your opinion. If you write a positive review just for entitlement, or to keep a good name for yourself, then you're being dishonest to potential readers. If you review one of my books, don't give me 4-stars or 5-stars because you think you're doing me a favor or you think I now owe you something. Give me 5-stars, 4-stars, 3-stars, 2-stars, or 1-star because you think my work deserves that score. Let other readers know if this book is worth their time and money. We should treat all authors equally.

And please, if you get a 4-star review, treat it as a good thing.

Things That Ruin Indie Publishing

When I first stepped into the world of indie publishing, I didn't realize just what kind of world I was stepping into. Thankfully, my experiences have been for the most part positive...but, as with anything a person becomes involved in, the negative aspects soon rear their ugly heads. To open up discussion on this, I thought I would give a simple list of things which either hurt indie publishing or give it a bad name for readers who may be used to more traditional publishing.

I don't claim to be the end all be all expert on indie publishing, so please don't take this blog post as canon or dogmatic pronouncements made ex cathedra. These are simply observations I have made myself, or complaints I've heard from other indie authors. Also keep in mind that I'm not trying to target any one author or person with this entire list; again, these are just general observations made. Yes, some examples will be cited or referred to, but this isn't meant as an attack post.

All that being said...are there any disturbing trends you have noticed? Feel free to leave a comment, and I just might add it to this blog post!

1) Unnecessary high prices.

When you look at most indie novels available for your e-reader, prices can vary from $2 to $5. Many times, authors will put their novels on sale for $0.99, or even let it go free. Keyword here: these are novels I'm talking about. For the amount of length you get to read, this is a pretty good deal, and when compared to books done by major publishers, you see the price is about the same.

Some people, however, will publish a 38-page book for $5...and even higher. It's as if people think they can publish the short story they wrote in high school and get a few bucks from it. I recently came across one indie author who was selling his 52-page novella for $16.95. I am not making that up! People really do pull stunts like this.

Not only is this kind of careless pricing going to hurt potential sales, but it makes readers believe that indie authors are simply out to make a quick dollar. To all authors who are doing this: seriously, please stop it!

2) Abysmal editing.

Typos are everywhere in the printed medium. Even in traditionally published books, there are typos (try reading Twilight and you'll see what I mean). This doesn't mean typos are okay, mind you; typos should be avoided at all costs. However, a few typos here and there might be overlooked by more forgiving readers. You forgot one punctuation on this one page? Is the rest of the book readable? OK, cool, we'll let that one slide; just remember to correct it in a future edition.

However, if an author self-publishes, and doesn't put any effort into editing their work, then the results are tragic. Punctuation mistakes abound, spelling mistakes make reading a chore, and awkward sentence structures rule the day. I've come across books that read like English wasn't the author's first language (and sadly, it was), as well as books that are so incoherent in sentence structure that they seem like the ramblings of a madman.

Readers might expect typos and glaring errors on a blog post, or a fanfiction website, or an internet forum with a "creativity" section, but if they're going to give money for what they expect to be a refined book, they should at least be honored by an author who puts time and effort into making certain that errors are kept to a minimum and the end product is as polished as possible.

3) Terrible cover designs.

For this section, I feel like I could just point people over to the website Lousy Book Covers and be done with it. If you want an example of why making a good cover can be important, then that site is chock full of them. For a lot of people, this is what they think of when they think of indie publishing.

The sad thing is, for many of the novels shown on Lousy Book Covers, I've actually gone to Amazon and read the samples, and have found that...many of them are actually pretty well written. The writing itself isn't half bad. In fact, sometimes it was really good. Unfortunately, when a potential reader comes across the work, they may not get the chance, or gain the interest, to pick up the book and read it, or even take a look at the sample chapter. They'll take a look at the cover, say, "By the gods, that's bad," and move on with life.

I understand that many indie authors (like myself) are working on a shoestring budget, and may be worried about how much they'll have to pay in order to get decent cover art. However, I would highly suggest that, if you invest in one thing for your book, it be this. There are websites where you can find premade or custom made covers, and there are artists out there willing to do work for you at an affordable cost. Some authors have spent $300 on their covers, but others have found decent covers for closer to around $50. Either way, the end result is that your book has a cover that doesn't look like someone's 12-year old dabbled in MS Paint for a few minutes.

An article worth reading on this subject is WillowRaven's post on their blog regarding the difference between cover design and covert art, as well as the difference between custom covers and original covers.

4) Terrible pen names.

A lot of indie authors use pen names, which is absolutely perfectly fine...but most make an effort to make certain the names they use are reasonable. They should, at the very least, sound like real names. So please...don't call your Cat Kicker. And don't call yourself by an internet handle like catkicker9000. That's cute on an internet forum, but not on a book.

And please, please, please, please don't call yourself by a fan version of another author's name. Don't call yourself B.K. Rowling. Don't call yourself George R.R. Tolkien. Again, you might laugh, but some indie authors have actually done just that.

5) Irrational author behavior.

Most well known authors are too busy with their day-to-day lives, or with their promotions and next projects, to bother with every internet critic of theirs. By contrast, many indie authors seem to not only have the time, but the passion, to go on a crusade and destroy anyone who dares suggest their book is terrible. If you want one major example, go and read my post on Norman Boutin, who has become internet infamous for his tirades and antics.

Nobody likes receiving a one-star review on Amazon. Nobody likes hearing someone tear their book apart. Nobody likes hearing words akin to "this sucks." However, that is part of putting your piece of art out onto the market and letting people comment on it. It doesn't matter if you're a classic writer like Dante Alighieri or a famous author like Stephen King...at least one person out there is going to absolutely hate your work. Many indie authors are aware of this, and have found ways to thicken their skin or train themselves to overlook criticism. They are, like Elsa, able to "let it go."

Other indie authors don't do this. They will respond to every single criticism with hostility. They will take the time to rant against negative reviewers on Amazon, or pull stunts like writing revenge reviews against said authors, or using sock puppet accounts to write positive reviews in an effort to "balance out" their score. Some have plotted with their agents or editors to get back at their credits. You're probably laughing, but I wish I was making half this stuff up. If you want some wonderful case studies on the various antics authors will go to in order to silence or blacklist their critics, go and look at the "Authors Behaving Badly" series on Pocketful of Books. What grown people are capable of doing will astound you.

UPDATE - February 18, 2015: Adam Dreece, over on his blog, has written a post on the same topic. It's worth a read.

Innocence Lost, Innocence Found

Recently my wife and I watched the 1982 animated film The Last Unicorn. In one scene of the film, we are introduced to the character of Molly Grue, a hard woman aged by years of work and rough living. When she first sees the eponymous Unicorn, she immediately gets emotional, and gives the follow exclamation:

Where were you twenty years ago? Ten years ago? Where were you when I was new? When I was one of those innocent young maidens you always come to? How dare you! How dare you come to me now, when I am this!

At the time of this writing, I haven't had the pleasure of reading Peter S. Beagle's original book, but from what I understand, Molly Grue is often described acting like a man (even spitting on the ground in one scene) and being much more rough around the edges than even how she's portrayed in the film. The point is, she is not the young girl she once was, with dreams and hopes. Life went another way for her - in fact, life went a very different way for her. She was no longer that "innocent young maid", she was now an older, rough, haggard, work woman for a group of forest bandits. When she saw the Unicorn, it suddenly reminded her of that innocent youth she had, when she believed in unicorns and expected them to come walking up to her like something out of a fantasy. When she encountered the unicorn, it was like that innocence coming back...and it reminded her of what she had become.

Over the past month, I've been reconnecting with old films from my childhood, and watching them now as an adult. On the one hand, I can appreciate them even more, because, unlike so much fluff today, they could be intelligent enough to still enjoyed by all ages. Films like The Last Unicorn, or others like The Dark Crystal, are often marketed or understood as "kid's films," and yet they offer motifs and lessons that are deep enough so that, even in the more comical moments, it's not felt as if you're talking down to children. I understood this even as a child watching The Last Unicorn - in fact, I loved it way more than my two younger sisters did (they actually hated it), and it was precisely because I recognized (like I did when I first watched The Dark Crystal) that there was so much to understand in the story that went beyond the basics. Watching these films again as an adult reminds me of what it was like to watch them for the first time as a kid - but even better.

On the other hand, when I reconnect with these gems from my youth, it reminds me of another time in my life. It reminds me of a time before I learned about depression, about despair, about lust, about want...about anything that gets into the mind of an adult and takes innocence away. It reminds me of a time when the magical elements of these films could mix with my own sense of reality, without having to pull me from it. I could take the darker moments of these films, and even some of their harsher lessons, and still walk away from it unscathed. When I watch these nostalgic pieces, I feel a warmth in my heart that so many loving memories are rekindled...but I am also reminded, like Molly Grue, of what I've become, and what I am now. I'm not the younger me. And that can be a shocking revelation.

In retrospect, however, the trials of life permit us to grow. They are part of becoming an adult. Many people still retain the negative aspects of childhood because they refuse to grow up. In The Last Unicorn, the motivations of King Haggard, the villain, come from a desire to feel young again, even though he is now an old man. By contrast, the Unicorn goes through anguish and inner turmoil in her experiences as the human Amalthea, and yet, at the end, is thankful for it all. Even in these treasured gems of my childhood, you see examples of the problems adults faced, and see characters having to deal with them and come out more mature.

Perhaps, really, that is why these films still resonate with us ten, twenty, or thirty years later on. As they age, so do we. Those deeper elements in the characters and story that we recognized as children but formerly could not register now hit home far too well. But that's what makes them so wonderful. That's why we still need them. Yes, we're Molly Grue now, and the remembrance of our former innocence may not always make us happy, but it can also cause us to reflect on our maturity, and what we have learned from it. Then we might be able to look on our former innocence and not mind. Let's remember, in that same scene I mentioned at the beginning, the Unicorn looks at Molly and says, "I'm here now." Let's keep a spark of that innocence from our past with us, and remember where we've come from, so we can better analyze where we are now.

World Building: Uniqueness in Mind

As some who follow me on Twitter know, I've been working on a fantasy novel for the past two months. (It is currently without a title - a slight source of frustration for me.) Part of planning the story is, of course, constructing the world around the characters and its history. I've begun taking notes in my journal and organizing religions, cultures, ways of keeping time, important historical events, and many other aspects of a fully functioning world. The best fantasy books I've come across were the ones which could make it feel like you were diving headfirst into a world which operated as such a world would. That is what I am hoping to capture in my WIP.

One thing constantly on my mind as I slowly form this world bit by bit is that I want to break from the usual mold of fantasy tropes. We've all seen the same formulas over and over again in mainstream presentations: humans live in generic medieval settings; elves are magical and in tune with nature; dwarfs are rough and tumble; etc. Obviously you don't want to go so far from the accepted canon that you might as well invent a whole new race (ie., writing about vampires that glitter in the sun), but you also want to avoid another Tolkien clone, or another D&D clone.

When I was in college, I was introduced to the computer game Arcanum: Of Steamworks and Magick Obscura (which is available on GOG.com). It was set in a world with fantasy staples such as humans, elves, orcs, dwarfs, halflings, etc. At the same time, it had some differences...namely, it mixed fantasy with elements of steampunk. You could choose to be an advanced magic user, but you could also learn how to combine various parts to form a machine or contraption to assist you. Your decision often led to in-game results, most notably the fact that if you became too high a magic user, you couldn't use the train, least the magic interfere with the gears. Likewise, the game introduced elements such as societal prejudice (half-orcs are looked down upon in the same way many minorities have been in various situations) or class warfare (ogres and orcs are used in poor working conditions akin to Victorian England, and in one scenario you can convince them to rise up in revolt). Yes, other worlds like Azeroth had goblins with their machines and gadgets, but Arcanum went a step further, and gave us a world that might exist in any fantasy setting, should technological and civil advancements be considered.

Point is, what I loved about Arcanum is that it took various fantasy tropes and reinterpreted them with a twist, and it did so quite successfully. For me, it's an inspiration on how to work with what people are used to and tweaking it into something new. It's an example of how that can work. Whether you end up loving the game or not (I happened to end up loving it), just the concept alone makes one stop and think, "Huh...OK, I might have to check that out." And when you see the opening cinematic with orcs and goblins flying aircraft around and shooting down zeppelins, you know you're in for something different the rest of the game.

The great thing about world building is that you don't need to play by a set of rules made up by some random person on the internet: you can design it the way you want. You can be creative. You're the creator of this world - just have fun creating it!

Lo! A Blog Hop

Introduction

So I have been tagged in a blog hop by CL Schneider, over at her blog. Here is how it works, as she explained it:

This blog hop is designed to show our readers a more personal side to ourselves. We've been challenged by another author/ blogger (somewhat like the 'ice bucket' challenge) to list seven interesting facts to help cast light onto that tough writer’s/blogger's persona we all like to project. But we want to show that behind every story is a story, our story, my story, and like everyone else I have dreams, hobbies, problems and goals. This blog hop is a way to share some of them with you, my readers.

The rules are that I share 7 Lovely Facts about myself, and links to at least 15 blogs that I enjoy reading. If I’ve nominated your blog (see names below) please don’t feel any obligation to join in but, if you do, please link back to the blog of the person who nominated you...share facts about yourself and nominate 15 blogs (or as many as you can).

Now, without further ado, seven fun facts about me (in no particular order).

1. I visited the Waterloo battlefield for my twelfth birthday.

Being a military brat, I grew up surrounded by a lot of military history books. So one day, when I was about ten or so, I started to read some of them. One of the first ones I read was The Limits of Glory by James McDonough. It was a book about the Battle of Waterloo done in the style of Michael Shaara's famous The Killer Angels. After reading it, I became an instant Napoleonic, and a lover of military history. Not too long after, my father was stationed in Germany, which meant I had access to a lot of foreign countries all along the border. One of them was Belgium, which was of course home to the Waterloo battlefield. So, for my twelfth birthday, my mom took myself and my sisters to Belgium, where we toured the battlefield, watched some light shows demonstrating the phases of the battle, and toured some of the nearby museums. It was definitely one of the best birthday experiences I've ever had. Some kids say they went to Chuck E. Cheese; how many could say they stood on the spot where Emperor Napoleon was decisively defeated and Europe was saved?

2. I am a huge Akira Kurosawa fan.

When I was thirteen, my dad showed me the movie Seven Samurai. I loved the movie, and it's one of the few films over three hours that I've watched many times over (the only other one probably being Gettysburg). I loved the movie so much, in fact, that I went out and looked for other films Kurosawa had done. I encountered Rashomon and Kagemusha, and after that I was hooked. This spring boarded me into other things: it was Kurosawa and his films which got me into studying Japanese history (especially the Sengoku Jidai), Japanese culture, and the Japanese language.

To this day, I have an extensive DVD collection of virtually all his films, as well as a few VHS tapes of those films not yet available on DVD. Kurosawa had a major impact on me in terms of visualization and how to make respectful filmmaking. I think it is also fascinating that he is one of the few filmmakers where you can see the growth of his persona from his earlier films (which were all about young earth shakers looking proudly to the future) and his later films (which were all about older characters looking mournfully back on "the good ol' days"). His films could be artistic without being indulgent, and could be emotional while being subtle. They have just as much an impact on me today as they did the first time I got into them.

3. I was present for the San Francisco earthquake of 1989.

The 1989 earthquake, made famous for taking place during the World Series, happened while my family was living there at the time. I've seen video of the earthquake on YouTube, and one thing I definitely do not remember is the earthquake building up so slowly. The way I remember it was I was in the living room with my mom, watching her play the original Zelda on NES (yes, my mom was a gamer, believe it or not - I think she beat most of our games). Suddenly, the house began to shake, and the TV went out. My mom and I rushed to the hallway, where we met my sisters, and we all huddled together while it went on. The funny thing was, in the midst of the house rocking back and forth and all this chaos, the only thing I remember thinking at the time was, "Oh no, the glasses in the kitchen are breaking!"

Thankfully, no one in my family was hurt, nor were any of our neighbors, and though we camped out that night, by the next morning it was clear that the house was safe, and we went back in without any problems.

4. I nearly died at birth.

When I was being born, the umbilical chord was wrapped around my head and arm. When they began to try to pull me out, the chord would wrap tighter, and cut off my breathing - as a result, my heartbeat would begin to slow down. The funny thing about all this was that no one noticed anything was wrong until a nurse happened to study the machine monitoring my heartbeat, and informed the doctor about it. In the end, my mom had to have a c-section.

5. For a brief period of my life, I was deathly afraid of the toilet.

When I was four-years old, I had a series of dreams in which the toilet, chanting "PEANUT BUTTER! PEANUT BUTTER!" came out of the bathroom and ate me. This was compounded with an incident where, hearing my own breath echoing off the bathroom walls, I mistook it for the toilet breathing. This convinced me, in my youthful imagination, that the toilet was not only alive, but out to get me!

Now some might ask here, "Did you stop using the toilet and go back to diapers?" No, not at all. If I had to do my business, I still went to the little boy's room. However, the minute I flushed, I would run like a bat out of hell out of the bathroom. Over time, I just grew out of this fear, and the toilet and I have had an understanding ever since. Also, don't ask me why the toilet was chanting peanut butter in my dream. To this day I have no idea. It is a hint at just how non sequitor my subconscious can be at times.

6. I have an unhealthy fascination with My Immortal.

For those who don't know, My Immortal is a Harry Potter fanfic written by a girl named Tara Gillespie, and is considered the worst fanfic ever written. No, really, it's that bad. It's basically about a Mary Sue character who is a goth vampire attending Hogwarts. While there, she engages in a relationship with Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter, then goes back in time to seduce Voldemort and hence keep him from becoming evil (I'm not making this up!). Everything about this fanfic is bad. Aside from the main character, who is obviously an author self-insert, virtually every aspect of the Harry Potter world is canon wrecked: Snape and Lupin are buddies; Draco Malfoy owns a flying car his father Lucian gave him; McGonagall is a villain; Umbridge and Fudge admit early on that Voldemort has returned and actively seek to stop him; the list goes on and on and on. Oh yeah, and Hedwig is transformed into a human who becomes Voldemort's bisexual lover. Did I happen to mention this fanfic has a lot of canon wrecking?

On top of this, the grammar problems make for some of the most humorous mistakes ever seen in literature. Tara warns readers that, due to the scariness of a certain chapter, viewer "excretion is advised." Snape's name is misspelled every possible way, including "Snake" and "Snoop". Lupin is described as "masticating" to a sexy video. I could literally write a book on all the grammar and spelling errors found within the forty-four chapters.

There is still debate to this day on whether Tara was writing seriously, or whether this was meant to be a trollfic. Either way, there is some level of brilliance seen in My Immortal, whether one wishes to attribute it to admiring a trollfic author's handiwork or reveling in schadenfreude. Yet despite myself, I cannot help but going back to it over and over again. The bad grammar, canon wreckage, and completely incompetent descriptions of sex ("he put his boy's thingy in mine" - let that sink in for a moment) make me literally L-O-L every single time.

If you want to know more about this fanfic, there's the My Immortal Wikia. I would also highly suggest the dramatic reading by LRMReading, who are three Scottish guys that read bad fanfiction - their reactions alone are worth the listen!

7. I currently have a side project to translate the Gospel of John into dovahzul.

Dovahzul is the dragon language found in the game Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. It entered my mind a while ago to attempt to translate the Gospel of John into Dovahzul (since they already have a Klingon project in the works for the whole Bible). It's an on again, off again project that I mostly do when I get bored and then remember that I started it

A friend also encouraged me to translate it into Dunmeri, but...first thing's first.

Blog Listing

As other people have said in regards to blog hops, I really don't follow too many blogs out there. So I'll just make a list of those that I'm familiar with in the indie writing world, with links to their blogs or websites:

CL Schneider
Adam Dreece
Jennie Davenport
Briana Morgan
SA Hunt
Willow Raven

My tagging will be done on Twitter.

Norman Boutin: A Case Study on How Not to Take Criticism

Every artist, of whatever genre or medium, has to deal with criticism. No matter who you are, there is going to be someone out there who is going to dislike your work, and there is going to be at least one person who absolutely hates it. Long story short, you are going to experience some negativity. Now, of course, negativity can a good thing: sometimes we need hard truths, and sometimes we need someone to point out our errors so that we can learn from them and improve our craft. On the flip side, there is also unhelpful or unedifying criticism that is best to just dismiss (for example, someone who reads a romance novel set in the 19th century and gets mad that there are no giant fighting robots should probably be ignored). Due to these two circumstances, being able to not only weed through criticism, but also to take what is helpful and learn from it, becomes an important part of any artist's life.

In regards to criticism in general, there are many ways you can respond to it: you can go the J.K. Rowling route and humbly accept it; you can go the Douglas Adams route and laugh it off; or you can go the George R.R. Martin route and shoot your critics the bird before moving on with life. One of the most important things to remember, however, is that you never have a meltdown. You never go on a crusade to end all criticism or defend your cause. You never let some angry person on the internet ruin your life. Some even suggest not even responding unless it's directed towards you, but to take the critique to heart nonetheless.

Some authors, especially in the Indie market, have chosen to ignore all of this. This blog post is an examination of one of them.

A while ago, I was introduced to an Indie author by the name of Norman Boutin, and a book of his entitled Empress Theresa. I first came across him in a post on Lousy Book Covers, where he had a scuffle with the website owner, Nathan. Long story short, he was "daring" Nathan to post the latest cover art for his book to the website, going so far as to say "I know you won’t." When Nathan did, Boutin gave this response:

Nathan, That is not the latest cover. It is the KINDLE edition cover which hasn’t been updated yet ( except in the KINDLE Store ) The latest cover can be seen in the Paperback version. The sky is a darker blue than in the version you showed. In any case, you didn’t put it up at the head of the thread where it should be and where it would be seen by people. I knew you wouldn’t. It would make your sad cover designs look ridiculous. Latest cover design can be seen on empresstheresa.com, [emphasis mine]

In case you didn't click on the Lousy Book Covers link yet, this is the cover art he's talking about:

"Notice how far better it is than the graphic design junk you sell to naive writers." [Exact quote from the author]

One need only Google his name (or the book's name) to find out just how highly he sees his own work. Of course, there's nothing wrong with taking pride in your writing, but Mr. Boutin reaches whole new levels of narcissism. He sincerely believes that his work is better and attracts more readers than classics like Brave New World or Anne of Green Gables. I'm not kidding. If you think I'm exaggerating, here is a direct quote from Mister Boutin himself:

I've noticed that on lists of books assigned to high school English classes, lists collected by academic services,  among the books read in class are such stories as George Orwell's 1984, Orwell's Animal Farm, and Aldous Huxley's Brave New World. A 16 year old high school girl a few miles from here read 1984 in her school. Really?  I'm astonished!  How infinitely more interesting and entertaining the students would have found Empress Theresa. [source; emphasis mine]

And another quote:

I have an idea.
Put the following books side by side on a table:
Empress Theresa
Little Women
Silas Marner
Anne of Green Gables
Tom Sawyer
Huckleberry Finn
and Gone With the Wind
Have the students vote **BY SECRET BALLOT !!** on which book to assign to the class.
Let me know how it turned out. [source]

Since Boutin believes that his book is the next American classic (even saying on some occasions that there will be a movie), it would be expected that he's less than happy about the widespread criticism it has received. On forums, he'll readily respond to anyone who suggests a less than enthusiastic opinion of his work, and on Amazon he's replied to nearly every single review. Reading through his replies, you tend to notice a pattern in how he treats negative criticism:

• If you criticize the book, or bring up criticism of it, he'll ask you to read his sample chapters and "judge for yourself" how good it is.

• If you follow his advice and read the sample chapters, or Amazon's sample chapters, and dislike it, he'll disregard your opinion since you didn't read the whole book. (In the realm of logical fallacies, this is called moving the goalposts).

• If you have read the whole book, and still don't like it, he'll still dismiss your opinion, and for any arbitrary reason he will find.

Reading Boutin's responses to those who post negatively about his book, his personality comes across very much like those people you find in art class reviews who have literally an excuse or response to every critique from their peers. They will continually say things like "Oh, you just don't get my metaphor" or "No, it's supposed to be that way." Almost every supposed fault has an excuse or an explanation that is meant to automatically negate it. Now granted, there may be times when there is a legitimate explanation for an artist's otherwise unorthodox aesthetic tactics...but when every single bit of criticism is met with a quick and rash defense, it begins to reveal more about the artist than it does about the art. What's more, if you try to tell them about this, or point it out, they defend themselves with "I'm just responding to you" or "I'm just showing you're wrong." In their mind, a habitual defense against every accusation or critique is a perfectly normal thing.

From Mr. Boutin's own personal discussions with his critics, one thing is certain: any perceived issues are never because of him. It never appears that Boutin even entertains the notion that there might be a problem with his book. It never seems to dawn on him, "You know, some of these people may have a point." He does not seem to have the capability to say, "There are a lot of complaints about this specific problem - let me change this to minimize this problem." If you want to know how far this goes, keep in mind that he will even defend his typos! I am not making this up: when people point out the typos in his book, he will argue that other authors have typos in their books (source); his conclusion is obviously that no one should complain about his, since other authors have made typos.

More telling is how insulting Boutin gets towards those who criticize his book. For someone who thinks his book is a wonderful showcasing of how a good Roman Catholic is to behave, it does not seem below the author to employ ad hominems and personal attacks against his critics. Some examples of this:

What really amazes me is that you say you're Catholic. It doesn't show. [source]

A kid's website, full of stuff to sell to kids to help dissipate their going-nowhere lives. [source; regarding the TV Tropes page on his book]

Next Fall, the next school year, all the trash you've written here, on TVtropes, and on Amazon will exposed for the trash it is. You credibility will go down the toilet. [source]

You're jealous because I had a great idea for a novel, because knowing it was an idea that could only be used once I spent years fine tuning it to make it the best writing possible, because it reaches the kids without blatant preaching, because you know you couldn't write something anywhere near as good, and so you attack my work using every device you can think of, spending enormous amounts of time to attack a stranger you'll never meet who lives on the other side of the world in a nice, quiet corner of the greatest country in the world. [source]

He's arrested at the spoiled, rotten 12 year old kid level. No matter how old he gets, he'll always behave at the 12 year old level. [source]

I've never seen such rude and crude people! Forty years ago I worked in a factory. Those people were much more civil and refined than this bunch. [source] 

I could have given PM Scherzer inner conflicts and weaknesses to make him more "interesting", according to the cliche advice I get here. [source]

I learned how conscience-less some people can be in trashing a message they don't like. [source]

Go back to your galactic war sci/fi stories, Tom.You will never understand a book like Empress Theresa. [source]

I came home today with the intention of writing an UNHAPPY NEW YEAR ! post to these lying haters, explaining to all what's wrong with them and why these lonely people whom nobody can like have to look for company on the internet but can't even stand each other either and never talk to each other. [source]

You're full of hot air and other stuff, Tom. [source]

Aw shut up! [source]

Even more astounding is the conspiratorial nature that Boutin takes towards much of his criticism. If you make a mistake, or misunderstand something from his book, he'll accuse you of "lying", purposefully spreading misinformation, or actively suppressing the truth. He'll often accuse critics of being part of an anti-Catholic, anti-theistic, anti-Norman Boutin conspiracy out to stop the "message" of Empress Theresa. He fears that those who are especially outspoken against the book are brainwashing other people against him. In case you think I am exaggerating or misrepresenting him, here are some examples (and keep in mind, these are said in absolute seriousness - he's not trolling):

These atheists from catholic.com, or whoever they are, won't stop the truth about the book from getting out. [source]

You're young and you're being fooled by the rantings of RPRPsych. He's playing mind games with all of us. [source]

Are you exchanging private messages with this guy? Don't do it. Don't let him get in your head. [source]

The atheists must really fear and hate this book. [source]

These people follow me all over the internet, even to websites I'd forgotten myself. [source]

Who are these people? They're from various 'writer's forums' I joined over the years. When I announced the paperback edition, suddenly there they were waiting to trash it. From my experience on those 'writer's forums' which contain thousands of members, I know that some of these people, those incapable or writing anything more serious than a vampire story, zombie story, or something of that kind, can be very negative in trashing a work that looks promising. It's envy. There's no limit to what they will do to spoil things.  [source]

This has been a concerted effort by people with an agenda to kill the spiritual message of the book they heard about on the internet for years. [source]

When one of my posts gets deleted, it's because I told the truth. People around here don't want you to learn the truth. [source]

For whatever reason, jealousy, anti-religious feelings, pure devilishness, or whatever, you want to kill the book. [source]

On this same note, let me say that yes, I have read the book. Or tried to read it. I eventually stopped because, to be perfectly frank, it gets really boring and tedious. You can read my review here, if you're curious. I go into detail about the problems I found within the book, and why I stopped reading. And before you ask...yes, Mr. Boutin responded to my review. He provided several responses, most of which I simply chose to ignore, because I have seen how he deals with criticism on the other reviews, and I have come to the conclusion that attempting to even engage in civil conversation with him is akin to nailing jello on the wall. However, one part that stood out to me, and which is related to this topic of his conspiracy theory forming mind, was this:

QUOTE Then you have the Prime Minister known as Peter Blair. While I understand from reading the author's comments elsewhere.......[[[[[ Ahah! Gotcha. 'elsewhere', hunh? Like I indicated earlier, this negative reviewer is taking bits and pieces from everywhere instead of just writing a valid review based on the book's own merits without prior knowledge. ]]]]]........ that he meant the character as an homage to Tony Blair... [source]

This accusation flabbergasted me. Yes, I had done research on Mr. Boutin's antics and arguments (as most of this post shows); however, part of this was to try to understand his point of view. My reference to having read his comments about Peter Blair "elsewhere" was simply to show that, from a source outside his book, I read an explanation of his regarding a character. I do this with any artist or author, because I like to understand where they're coming from. It's why I listen to DVD commentaries, and it's why I read artist biographies. In the past, I've even tweeted questions to authors before writing reviews because I wanted their own clarification on certain things. My point in bringing this up is to show that Mr. Boutin could not simply say, "Oh, that was nice of him to do research on me." Nope. It's a conspiracy. I'm just going around, digging up dirt on him, and not basing my opinion on any knowledge of "the book's own merits". Again, it's all a giant conspiracy to him. Everyone who doesn't like his book has an agenda and is out to ruin his cause.

The sad thing is that some people have attempted to reach out to him, and help him to get his book edited either through classes or professional assistance. Thus far, he has spurned all advice. As I wrote before, there seems very little admittance on his part that his book could be improved. By contrast, I've known of plenty of authors (professional and Indie) who lament errors or mistakes in their books they wish they could change. Heck, the wife of Frank Frazetta, one of the greatest painters of the 20th century, had to put a lock on his museum door because he was sneaking in and touching up some of his most famous paintings. Yes, even someone like Frank Frazetta would tell you that he's not entirely happy with some of his work. Yet there are those out there like Mr. Boutin who think their work is above criticism, and is absolutely perfect. If you think the book is somehow lacking, that's a problem with you, rather than the book.

Of course, it's real easy to enter the realm of schadenfreude, where we all point and laugh at someone else's shortcoming. However, I believe instances like this are a good moment to pause and think, "Wait a minute...am I like that?" I have to look at this and wonder if I feel the need to respond to every single critic. I have to ask myself if maybe I have an excuse for every single critique I receive. I have to review how I take criticism on a large scale, and see whether or not I presume it is all a giant conspiracy by a large group of people. I have to look at how I respond to a person's critique, and make certain I am not misrepresenting them, or jumping to conclusions.

The worst thing we can do is not learn from the mistakes of others; we'll spend so much time laughing at someone else that we'll forget we're staring right in a mirror. Let's take a moment like this to sit back and examine ourselves, and see if, just perhaps, we struggle with this as well.

Update - January 1, 2015: The initial comments towards my review, made by Norman Boutin himself, and which I quoted earlier, have been erased by Amazon. In their place, a whole new slew of comments between Norman and other commentators have begun. Many of these comments I have included in the part regarding ad hominems.

Update - February 5, 2015: Norman Boutin has hit a new low in his attack against critics. Recently he made these statements:

My sister was operated on this morning. She was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer last Summer. She's been getting radiation and chemotherapy to prepare for the surgery. They took out the tumor today but her prognosis is very poor. The disease is 95% fatal.

It would have been nice if she'd lived to see Empress Theresa the great success it should be. But thanks to you internet trolls that won't be for several more years.

YOU PEOPLE ARE SCUM !!!!!!!!!!!!!

You better hope God will forgive you. I won't. [source]

Let me first say that, if it is true Norman Boutin's sister has cancer, that is terrible, and my thoughts and prayers go to him and her. I have had family members who suffered with cancer, and I know it is not a pleasant thing to go through. It gives me absolutely no pleasure that someone in his family has cancer. All that being said...

To use his sister's cancer to try to shame his critics for criticizing his book is a disgusting emotional tactic. I really have no other words for it.

If my readers are interested in an example of how not to react to criticism, Norman Boutin has reached the pinnacle of it.

"The Anger Replaced the Shock"

The following is a pretty good example of why it's important to double check your writing, get an editor, and try to minimize your spelling errors.

 (Warning, some bad language and crude humor).